ApocaDocs
Today is December 12, 2025.
On this day (12/12), we posted 14 stories, over the years 2009-2016.


Converging Emergencies: From 2009 to 2016, 'Doc Jim and 'Doc Michael spent 30 to 90 minutes nearly every day, researching, reading, and joking about more than 8,000 news stories about Climate Chaos, Biology Breach, Resource Depletion, and Recovery. (We also captured stories about Species Collapse and Infectious Disease, but in this "greatest hits of the day" instantiation, we're skipping the last two.)
      We shared those stories and japes daily, at apocadocs.com (see our final homepage, upon the election of Trump).
      The site was our way to learn about what humans were doing to our ecosystem, as well our way to try to help wake up the world.
      You could call this new format the "we knew it all back then, but nobody wanted to know we knew it" version. Enjoy these stories and quips from a more hopeful time, when the two ApocaDocs imagined that humanity would come to its senses in time -- so it was just fine to make fun of the upcoming collapse.

Try any other day:
Month:

Day:



Biology
Breach


December 12, 2014, from Climate Progress

The Ocean Now Has At Least 700 Pieces Of Plastic Per Person On Earth

Planet Polystyrene
A study published on Wednesday estimates that the ocean contains over 260,000 tons, or 5.25 trillion pieces, of plastic. The study found that the amount of microplastics, pieces of plastic that are less than half a centimeter, found on the ocean's surface were much smaller than expected.... Over 90 percent of the searches that the study did contained plastic, and polystyrene made up most of the plastics found. One of the researchers said that in some areas with larger amounts of debris, there was more plastic in the water than living creatures.


December 12, 2012, from ProPublica

Poisoning the Well: How the Feds Let Industry Pollute the Nation's Underground Water Supply

Water, water everywhere....
Federal officials have given energy and mining companies permission to pollute aquifers in more than 1,500 places across the country, releasing toxic material into underground reservoirs that help supply more than half of the nation's drinking water. In many cases, the Environmental Protection Agency has granted these so-called aquifer exemptions in Western states now stricken by drought and increasingly desperate for water.... The recent surge in domestic drilling and rush for uranium has brought a spike in exemption applications, as well as political pressure not to block or delay them, EPA officials told ProPublica. "The energy policy in the U.S is keeping this from happening because right now nobody -- nobody -- wants to interfere with the development of oil and gas or uranium," said a senior EPA employee who declined to be identified because of the sensitivity of the subject. "The political pressure is huge not to slow that down."

Climate
Chaos


December 12, 2014, from Climate Progress

Top Scientists To Media: Stop Using 'Skeptic' To Describe Climate Science Deniers

How about we call deniers "rejects."
Four dozen leading scientists and science journalists/communicators have issued a statement urging the media to "Please stop using the word 'skeptic' to describe deniers" of climate science.... "Proper skepticism promotes scientific inquiry, critical investigation, and the use of reason in examining controversial and extraordinary claims," the letter reads. "It is foundational to the scientific method. Denial, on the other hand, is the a priori rejection of ideas without objective consideration."


December 12, 2014, from NBC News

2014 Boils Toward Warmest Year Ever with Three More Records Broken

Some days ... you just don't want to get out of bed for fear what you'll find.
Even if it's freezing in your personal universe, Earth as a whole just broke three "warmest" records and is likely to see 2014 go down as the warmest since record keeping began in 1880, scientists reported Thursday. Driven by record warm oceans, combined sea and land temperatures in October were the warmest on record, according to data released by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. On top of that, January-October was the warmest first 10 calendar months, while November 2013 to October 2014 was the warmest 12-month block.


December 12, 2009, from Associated Press

968 detained at climate rally urging bold pact

Would that such preventive action were being taken regarding the planet.
COPENHAGEN - Tens of thousands of protesters have marched through the chilly Danish capital and nearly 1,000 were detained in a mass rally to demand an ambitious global climate pact, just as talks hit a snag over rich nations' demands on China and other emerging economies. The mostly peaceful demonstrations in Copenhagen on Saturday provided the centerpiece of a day of global climate activism stretching from Europe to Asia. Police assigned extra officers to watch protesters marching toward the suburban conference center to demand that leaders act now to fight climate change... Police said they rounded up 968 people in a preventive action against a group of youth activists at the tail end of the demonstration.


December 12, 2009, from Alaska Journal of Commerce

Climate change eroding coast at accelerating rate, scientists find

The Great Thaw is going to unearth a whole lotta old shit.
Coastal erosion isn't the only climate-related problem confronting rural communities. Health officials now are concerned about food and water safety in northern villages as warming temperatures thaw ice cellars and melting permafrost increases the organic content in rivers, creating problems in village water treatment plants. Increased erosion is presenting problems within the petroleum reserve. Erosion has the potential to expose old oil and gas drill sites and reserve pits, where contaminants are stored.

Resource
Depletion

Recovery


December 12, 2014, from The Independent (UK)

New era of cheap oil 'will destroy green revolution'

Let's rethink ourselves, and rethink that again.
The collapsing oil price that is reshaping the global economy could derail the green energy revolution by making renewable power sources prohibitively bad value, experts have warned. Oil tumbled below $60 a barrel for the first time in more than five years yesterday - a fall of 44 per cent since June. It is forecast to fall further. A new "era of cheap oil" would be good news for consumers and motorists - but analysts say the consequences for politics, industry and the climate could be even more radical. The ripple effects could help the Conservatives to remain in power at next year's general election by making voters feel richer as bills fall - while hurting Scotland's oil-reliant economy and setting back its campaign for independence.


December 12, 2014, from Midwest Energy News

Minnesota will 'get the ball rolling' on community solar today

We're harvesting the sun in these gardens.
Expectations are high today as Minnesota's largest utility begins accepting applications for community solar projects at 9 a.m. today. It's anyone guess show many solar garden developers will submit on the first day of business for Xcel Energy's Solar Rewards Community program. Some developers have already marketed and sold out projects that have been not formally approved... Community gardens allow customers to buy panels or subscriptions from developers who manage and operate the systems. Customers can buy up to 120 percent of their energy needs, or as little as one panel. They receive a credit on their utility bills based on the output of their panels.


December 12, 2013, from National Public Radio

Robots Could Help Farmers Rein In Fertilizer Pollution

No shit! Or rather... less shit.
Lately, robots have been taking over all kinds of jobs that humans used to do on the farm -- from thinning lettuce to harvesting spinach. Three brothers in Minnesota are betting that robots could compete with machines on the farm, too: the huge, and often inefficient, fertilizer applicators made by John Deere and the like. The brothers' Rowbot, in comparison, is so small it can move between rows of crops and fertilize plants one at a time. "We joked about it being the Roomba of the cornfield," says one of the brothers, Kent Cavender-Bares, referring to the autonomous vacuum cleaner. The motivation for creating a fertilizer robot is simple: Many farmers overuse fertilizer, and that's costly and bad for the environment. But farmers don't have many tools to help them cut back.


December 12, 2012, from ThinkProgress

AGU Scientist Asks, 'Is Earth F**ked?' Surprising Answer: Resistance is NOT Futile!

Why does it really matter if Earth is 'finked'?
In sum, the dynamics of the global coupled human-environmental system within the dominant culture precludes management for stable, sustainable pathways and promotes instability.... Active resistance by concerned groups of citizens, analogous to the anti-slavery and civil rights movements of the past, is one of the features of the planetary system that plays an important role in his model. If you think that we should take a much longer view when making decisions about the health of the "coupled human-environmental system" -- that is to say, if you're interested in averting the scenario in which the Earth is f**ked -- then, Werner's model implied, resistance is the best and probably only hope. Every other element -- environmental regulation, even science -- is too embedded in the dominant economic system.


December 12, 2011, from The ApocaDocs

2011 ApocaDocs Year In Review

I hear there are nekkid pichers of LiLo in Playboy, just in time for the holidays!
The top 100-and-change from the more than 1,000 news items bequipped by 'Docs Jim and Michael in 2011, all in one place -- with punchlines! This distillation is 200-proof grain alcohorror that may make you wish you were blind. Climate chaoses, species collapses, biology breaches, and much more from the whole human tragicomedy of the last 12 months. If only it weren't so -- but then, if it wasn't so, the 'Docs would have to make fun of Lindsay Lohan instead.


December 12, 2009, from Milwaukee Journal Sentinel

It's best to avoid BPA, federal official says

Then what are we grown men? Chopped liver?
The head of the primary federal agency studying the safety of bisphenol A said Friday that people should avoid ingesting the chemical - especially pregnant women, infants and children. "There are plenty of reasonable alternatives," said Linda Birnbaum, director of the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences and the National Toxicology Program, in an interview with the Journal Sentinel. While stressing she is not a medical doctor, Birnbaum said she has seen enough studies on the chemical to be concerned about its effects on human health... Asked if consumers should be worried about BPA, Birnbaum said, "Absolutely."


December 12, 2009, from Associated Press

AP IMPACT: Science not faked, but not pretty

Whew! Thank goodness the Apocalypse is going to transpire as planned!
E-mails stolen from climate scientists show they stonewalled skeptics and discussed hiding data - but the messages don't support claims that the science of global warming was faked, according to an exhaustive review by The Associated Press. The 1,073 e-mails examined by the AP show that scientists harbored private doubts, however slight and fleeting, even as they told the world they were certain about climate change. However, the exchanges don't undercut the vast body of evidence showing the world is warming because of man-made greenhouse gas emissions. The scientists were keenly aware of how their work would be viewed and used, and, just like politicians, went to great pains to shape their message. Sometimes, they sounded more like schoolyard taunts than scientific tenets.